showing: The Red [Prypiat] Diaries

That title definately sounds a lot sexier than the actual name of this week's newest theatrical horror release here in Portland, Chernobyl Diaries (2012):


From the title, I would assume that this movies is a series of shorts dealing with individuals reflecting back on their memories of 1986 when the Chernobyl reactor unexplicable surged in power causing the immediate evacuation of surrounding areas as a radioactive cloud moved across the land. I assume I am wrong as always since the trailer makes the "diaries" part of this title seem completely random.

This event definately has tons of horror potential from speculating on the cause of the surges (the devil choosing sides during the Cold War?) to the present day affects of that incident (the Russian hills have eyes?). I have no idea which way Chernobyl Diaries is headed from its trailer, but the sets look great and the movie has potential as being a sort of Blair Witch on a larger scale.

Russia is still a very intriguing place for us United Staters, and I hope it gets the horror treatment it can truly provide. We recently had The Darkest Hour (2011) taking place in Moscow, and I constantly fantasize about a crazy re-make of Stalker (1979).

Drop back in post-viewing and let us know what you thought of the movie in the comment section below or check the "now Showing" tab above to see what other movies are on Portland screens this week.

events: West Coast Haunters Convention



This weekend, June 1-3, marks the 3rd annual West Coast Haunters Convention here in Portland, OR. From their website (link provided in the right hand column of this page):
What Comic-Con International is to the comics industry, haunt conventions are to the haunted attraction industry, an industry that (unlike comics) comes front-loaded with billions of dollars in advertising each Halloween. This event attracts a niche of Halloween enthusiasts and haunt owners who seek education, tips, ideas, social interaction, and networking with others in the haunt industry.
That's right, 3 days of industry focus just on how to better construct your perfect haunt (imagine being your neighborhood's Clark Griswold of Halloween), that is open to the public for a mere Jackson per day. Also during the event will be a hearse car rally, friday night haunt tours, make-up classes, and a costume ball.

Check their full schedule of events and speakers [here] and keep your eye on STH for further updates on the event if we can find a way in the door.

As always this and all other Portland horror-related events can be found on our "upcoming Events" calendar at the top of this page.

showing: Squirm (1976)

Tonight's monthly Grindhouse Film Festival showing at the Hollywood Theatre will be one of my personal favs, Squirm (1976). From the GFF site:
When a violent storm rocks a small community, a series of power lines are knocked to the ground, sending high voltage electricity deep into the earth. The surge of power hits tens of thousands of earthworms, sending them into a flesh-eating frenzy! A young couple and a detective try to save the town, but not before angry worms start infesting houses, spilling out of facets, and burrowing into people's skin. If the thought of drowning in a sea of worms makes your skin crawl, then this is the movie for you.

on video: 29 May 2012

Its a new Tuesday, and the means a new pile of BRDs are on the shelves.  Starting off our list this week is the newest release from The Asylum: Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies (2012). The Asylum is at its best when preempting larger studio releases and ALvZ is entering the home market as Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012) awaits its June 22nd theatrical release.


The next few discs (The Demoniacs (1977), The Rape of the Vampire (1968), and Requiem for a Vampire (1973)) represent the second flood of discs from Redemption Films looking to cash in on and/or preserve in HD the library of director Jean Rollin after his passing a couple years back. We here at STH have never partaken in any of his films and welcome all recommendations in the comments section below.




Shiki (2010) is a Japanese TV series that follows the inhabitants of a small, isolated village that is slowly being killed off by vampires. Across these two sets, you get 22 episodes of what looks rather intriguing from the free episodes that can be watched over on its IMDb page.

And, representing American TV-to-video is the complete fourth season of HBO's True Blood (2011).

events: PDX Zombie Prom 5


Though there wasn't much to this year's May of the Dead, its concluding Zombie Prom is still a go and this year's theme is "Night at the O'scares." STH had every intention of being this events Joan Rivers on the red carpet -- collecting photos of the latest designer clothing and conducting interviews with Portland's more famous undead, but alas Operation Subteranean Lair is still underway as is the first of this year's Cascadia Cup matches.  This means I will be a zombie this weekend, just not at the Bossanova. Please report back with stories of the night and remember to always check back here for all your Portland-related horror events, even those we at STH sadly cannot ourselves attend.

review: Shark Night 3D (2011)

IMDb Plot Summary

David R. Ellis, Hollywood lifer and director of such genre gems as Final Destination 2 (2003), Snakes on a Plane (2006), and Asylum (2008), returns to the director's chair once more for Shark Night 3D (2011).  Though it'll be easy for lazier reviewers to dismiss this film as easily as Ellis's previous efforts, this time find's Ellis playing the part of a Scorsese-ian smuggler by infusing this low-grade, 3D shark thriller with a damning indictment of the Hollywood film making craft.

I readily acknowledge I am probably overly reading into Shark Night 3D when I proclaim it to be an astute bit of social/film commentary, but please hear me out.

The very premise of the film is built on a twisted understanding of what the Hollywood institution thinks we want as viewers. The bad guys in Shark Night are literally banking on the lensing of varied and elaborate deaths for their viewers' dollars, a filmmaking tradition that stretches from the aforementioned Final Destination series back to The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971). Simultaneously, the film looks to use a thin plot premise to run out over the top computer-generated images much like every contemporary blockbuster be it Transformers (2007), Avatar (2009), et cetera. In not committing the adequate resources to create “believable” CGI sharks for a film that got a big time theatre release, and in 3D to boot, the originally titled “Untitled 3D Shark Thriller” seems to be much more self aware than one might originally perceive.

Where lies the commentary I promised? Shark Night reminds us that great films are a reflection of their time and the contemporary human struggle, not a mindless spectacle. Successful special affects should be those that serve the narrative rather than be an excuse to create one. This film can remind us, in our complaints of it, that maybe we have lost touch with that notion and are instead in search of the next thin plot premise to hang expensive CGI's on that top the last expensive CGI spectacle that we partook in. We want to see a myriad of believable shark murders over human drama or social commentary and we’re sad that Shark Night 3D didn’t deliver. Instead, it offers to hold a mirror up to us as viewers in general and in doing so I'd rather watch a million Shark Nights than the next Avatar. This particular reading of the film is what will place it firmly on my list of 2011's Best Horror Film.

review: Pandorum (2009)

IMDb Plot Summary

Christian Alvart is the director of Pandorum (2009), a film that was advertised as being from the creators of the Resident Evil (2002) series, though he had no part in those films. The Resident Evil production team is here in full force though including that series' director Paul W.S. Anderson. I bring this up simply because Pandorum plays merely as a lower budget mash-up of three films helmed by Anderson: Event Horizon (1997)'s space insanity, Resident Evil's Alice character, and AVP: Alien vs. Predator (2004)'s framing of the other.  This isn't a totally fair assessment as the filmmakers also decided to blend a monster foe derivative of those in Neil Marshall's The Descent (2006).

What we're then presented with as viewers is simply the urge to stop watching Pandorum mid-presentation, pick our favorite aspect, and choose accordingly which of the corresponding films above we'd rather go re-watch instead.